Details

I was reading John's account of the resurrection this morning. A noticed a detail that I had missed before...it's a detail that even Luke didn't write about. It goes like this, "Then Simon Peter, who was behind him, arrived and went into the tomb. He saw the strips of linen lying there, as well as the burial cloth that had been around Jesus' head. The cloth was folded up by itself, seperate from the linen." John 20:6-7

Did you catch it? The detail? "The cloth was folded up by itself, seperate from the linen. The study Bible suggests that this tells us that it wasn't a grave robbery, since everything would be in disarray if it had been. But to me it's more. Take a moment to close your eyes and imagine what those first few moments when Jesus came back to life must have been like. Of course nobody really knows...and maybe I am going out on too much of limb by suggesting it, but there is a sense of comfort I get from this "imagining." The silence and darkness of the tomb. A sudden intake of breath. His eyes open, and he sits up, with a slight smile on his lips as He knows that He has beaten death and the devil. He unwraps the linens, tenderly removes the burial cloth from around his head.

The cloth that Joseph and Nicodemus had prepared Jesus' body with 3 days earlier. Probably with tears of sadness. Perhaps in silence as neither knew what to say to the other, wondering if they dared hope to remember Christ's promise or to even vocalize it. Nicodemus knew the promise. He was the man that Jesus told, "for God so loved the world, that he gave his one and only son, that whoever beleives in him shall not perish but have eternal life." The thoughts that must have been going through this man's head as he cared for the lifeless body of Christ!

And now Christ awakes. He too remembers his late night teaching of Nicodemus. With the same care that was taken placing the cloth on his head, Jesus removes it. He does not throw it on the ground and run off to await Mary. He takes a few precious moments, while the angels rejoice, the birds sing, the ground shakes....he stops, takes up his burial cloth and folds it neatly. And then he leaves the tomb behind. With it he leaves his message of love for Nicodemus, Peter, and you.

In Harmony

That's how I feel right now: in harmony. I've had touches of it here and there, but today...today it is real. When I was more musical and played in a variety of groups, the band not playing together was called phasing...it happens when one part of the group is playing at a different tempo than another part. Not only does the band need to play in tune to sound right, each member needs to play at the same tempo. The quickest and easiest way to accomplish that is to watch the conductor.

My life, the way I live it, it's like keeping each part of the band harmonized, and at the same tempo. Sometimes, there might be a part that plays solo....the players in the background keep playing, but work, my children, my husband, each take center stage at some point, but never for the whole song. Sometimes, one performs louder...starts beating their drum a little too fast, trying to take over and push me along at a speed that isn't in harmony with the rest of my life. If that is allowed to happen, eventually the whole song will come to a screaching halt, cymbals will crash, the trumpet will fade out on a sour note, the clarinets will be too shrill....and it seems like the only thing that will fix the problem will be to stop, put the instruments down, give up, if nothing else, start completely over and try again.

But it's not done, there is a way to fix it without giving up, without starting again, or finding a new song to play. All of it can come back into harmony, back into the right tempo if I keep my eyes on my conductor, my leader, the one who orchestrates my life. Only God can keep my song together, can make each and every part of my life playing the sweet notes that He intended them to be.

Square pegs in round holes

We've all heard this analogy before: "you can't fit a square peg into a round hole". Going through teacher education I heard it all the time. Every kid is different, you can't force a child with their own unique characteristics to fit into a program that doesn't meet their needs and strengths. It's the idea of "diffirentiated" curriculum. The ideal that a teacher can create a classroom that fits all shapes of children is taught to us as "best practices". It all sounded great in college, but then I got into my own classroom. I know that a teacher can force a square (or star) shaped child into her round peg classroom...but not with some bruising or cutting off of the corners. Maybe those corners can be reattached on the other side, but the scars and evidence that some damage has been done never go away. How do I avoid this in MY classroom? How do I celebrate the strengths and meet the needs of EVERY child in my room. There isn't enough time or room to have a curriculum that is square shaped, star shaped, circle shaped, AND dodecahedron shaped. Further, there are boundaries, expectations, and lessons that every child really needs to be aware of. So, how do I provide these experiences, and boundaries without damaging the spirit and uniqueness of every child in my care? I hope I've found a way to do that. My classroom can be a circle hole. I can make clear the expectations of my classroom, provide guidelines and the curriculum that every child needs, but I do it by making my circle large enough that every shape can fit into it. The overall "look" of my program can stay circle shaped. However, it's large enough to be flexible, caring, and accepting of every child. This is my goal, I pray that God gives me the strength and guidance to meet it.

"Ill blows the wind that profits nobody."

The afternoon sun blazed down upon the Wyoming fields of corn. I watched from the serenity and comfort of my parents' living room as the gentle gusts grew to forceful gusts. The first sign of the oncoming storm was the dust blowing from the parched earth. Within moments tips of the corn stalks danced as the wind increased in its strength. The trees began to wave violently, as if begging me to let them inside so that they would not have to endure this storm.

I sat in amazement, thinking back to when we had a similar windstorm in Nebraska and several trees were uprooted or lost large branches. Upon investigation I saw only one lone small twig blowing across the street. Expressing my astonishment to some friends, one replied that maybe trees are like people: they grow stronger in times of turbulence.

I do not know if she realizes how much her comment impacted me during this time of my own turbulence. I have waved my arms and cried to God, begging Him to take this storm away from me, that I don't want to have to endure it. "Oh how much more wonderful things would be, " I think to myself, "if only I could live in the protective shield of a valley, where the winds don't blow and I am free to grow in peace." But what would happen when that wind does blow? Would I then be uprooted, or lose a major branch, or even completely split?

I shall grow stronger in this time of turbulence. I will send my roots down deeper and hold on tight to God's word. And maybe someday I will be there for another tree to lean against during its time of turbulence. Then, perhaps we may both grow stronger as we reach for the Heavens and spread our branches in praise to our maker and our God.

"Ill blows the wind that profits nobody".

~Shakespeare

"Each man will be like a shelter from the wind, and a refuge from the storm".

~Isaiah 32:2

Keep on lovin' you

Love takes the patience of Job
That's what my Mama always said
Faith is the belief in something more
than what you know
That's what the Good Book says
You gotta play the cards you got
Who knows what fate is holding
At times you gotta go without
knowing where you're going

That's why I keep on lovin' you
I keep on lovin' you
Through the baby don't leave mes
And never will agains
And I promise tos
I keep on lovin' you

Lord knows we've had our share of fights
Our sleepless nights, our ups and downs
We've had plenty and then some of baby
I'm gones and turnarounds
Sometimes I swear it might be easier
to throw in the towel
Someday we're gonna look back
Say look at us now


I'll keep on lovin' you
Through the I take it backs...I didn't mean it like thats
I'd never hurt yous... Oh, I keep on lovin' you

~ Reba Mcentire

Raining Sunshine

Yesterday we woke up bright and early and rushed out of the house so we could go riding. I have been waiting, weeks, no, months to be able to go riding again, especially since I got the new saddle. Yesterday was finally the day, the rain has backed off, Patty and I both had time available, it was time. We don't get more than 5 minutes from the house when the rain starts to fall ...sigh....I refuse to acknowledge the little droplets splashing on my windshield, so refrain from turning on the windshield wipers (why would I turn on my wipers if it's "not" raining?).

Thankfully we arrive at Patty's and the rain stops. Apparantly some parenting strategies work with weather too: if you don't give attention to the bad behavior, sometimes it will stop. So, we saddle up the horses. Daniel wants to ride THAT one: the paint who isn't broke and keeps dancing around at the end of his rope. I convince that Daniel needs to ride with me on THIS one: the 26 year old Bomb proof quarter horse. We had a great day of riding. When we finished, Patty and I discovered that Timmy and her youngest, Ethan, had found the Mulberry tree and smeared berry juice ALL over their faces. Ethan assured us that it was quite refreshing!

After that we headed into Utica so I could begin work in my preschool room. I had gone in with he idea that I would start working on rearranging the room, instead I spent the time filling out paperwork.

We headed home, tired and ready for a break. Daniel napped while Timmy and I zoned out together. After our brief rest it was time for swimming lessons. Timothy has amazed me this week with his swimming abilities. Timothy, my child who has had a phobia of water on his face from the day he was born. Timothy, who spent the first 4 and a half so years of his life screaming and hollering every time we rinsed his hair in the bathtub. Yes, this is the same child who, just a year ago, was thrilled that he put his face under water at the hotel swimming pool when in fact his "face" was just his chin. Having a little brother to take baths with has certainly helped. Daniel has certainly increased Tim's exposure to having water on his face with all of his splashing and playing in the bathtub. However, I still wasn't sure how lessons would go since last week Tim was still avoiding getting his face wet at the pool.

So, last night was Timmy's fourth day of swimming lessons: he is floating on his back, swimming on his tummy using a kickboard, AND, get this: holding his breath under water for 20 plus seconds (and not just his chin!) And he's loving it, his face just beams when he gets out of the water.

Immediately at the conclusion of swimming lessons Tim needed to head next door to the baseball fields for his last t-ball game (swimming lessons ended at 6, the game began at 6). T-ball was fun, I think Timmy and I are both glad it's done for this year, that's all I'll say about it.

Then we came home and were exhausted. It was a hot day. One of those days where the wind would blow but it was a HOT wind, not the kind of soft breeze that helps to cool you off. I was tuckered out, the boys were tuckered out, bedtime would certainly come early tonight!

The sun was still shining, brightly in the West as it started to descend towards the horizon. And then it started to rain, straight down in sheets, while the sun continued to shine. When I was in Hawaii we called it "raining sunshine". Timmy asked "can we go out in it??!" and I said "Absolutely!" So we did, Timmy, Daniel and I ran outside letting the cool raindrops fall on us while the sun continued to provide it's warmth. "Aaaaah," I said, "this is refreshing!" Timmy's eyes light up with that oh so mischevious look of his as he takes off around the fence to: you guessed it, the mulberry tree. What's more refreshing than a cool rain at the end of a hot day? Mulberries smeared all over the face. We might have a market started here! "Mulberry Rainshine Facial"